Hmm. Accomplish much? Too much?
So after writing my brief previous post listing some of the tasks accomplished today (I also was on a search committee interview for a new director of residence life and worked out twice), I realized that I may be too focused on completing tasks. This evening I had the option of going to a great art gallery showing, going to the People of Color meditation at the East Bay Meditation Center, or coming home and eating a tuna fish sandwich and having a glass of hot cocoa. I chose the tuna fish and cocoa with a side of reality TV. How boring can this girl be!
Some folk relax with meditation. Others go to a bar and watch a game. I went home for canned tuna fish on gluten free bread, hot cocoa, and dreaming (posting on Facebook) about gluten free carrot cake that I plan to have for my birthday. By the way, my birthday is in April.
I am totally on the fence as to whether this way of relaxation is ok or not. My worry is that, with the latest heartbreak (and the requisite image of a heart torn to so many pieces, stitched back together, and torn up again that it really is nothing but threads bynow), I've started putting myself through a self-imposed exile. I get a lot done, but that doesn't ground me in the world or in this place at all. My general coping mechanism for hurt is to either throw myself into work (my reading and conference schedule shows hints of this) or move. When I move, it's generally not across the street. We are talking cross country/out of country moves, which I don't want to do. I really like my gig and the Bay Area.
Other coping mechanisms could be to just heal, and I think that a healthy way of healing would be to fill my life with those things I love and are engaging to me: dance, cooking, art, poetry, music, social outings, etc. As good as that tuna fish sandwich was, it may be time to brainstorm something else, something that gets me out of the house. In the meantime, I'm going to go play my cello. It's a little less boring and a lot more exciting than tuna.